Savage Lovecast

by Dan Savage

Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savagelovecast.com and get yourself a season subscription.

  

Latest Episodes

Savage Love Episode 714

A gay married man faces a choice. He can keep his stable job, if he moves to...Kansas. Dan brings on Kansas State Representative Brandon Woodard to try to sell his state to the caller. At the top of this list of the midwestern state's redemptive qualities: Kansas is only 3 hours away from everywhere else! So, they've got that going for them. A woman is horrified that her husband wants to "suckle" her breasts as if she were lactating. "Just one time?" he begs. On the Magnum, Dan gushingly chats with public health super-hero Dr. Demetre Daskalakis. The dreamy Deputy Commissioner for Disease Control at the NYC Health Department is responsible for some of the most honest, rational, pro-sex messaging coming out of New York City, and Dan is nothing less than star-struck. Listen in. And, a woman with step-children found herself watching some step-mom porn. And she liked it! WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? 206-302-2064   voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep-the best mattress for your individualized comfort. Right now, get up to $200 off ALL mattress orders at . This episode is brought to you by Allform- premium, customizable sofas and chairs shipped right to your door. For 20% off your perfect sofa, go to . This episode of the Savage Lovecast is brought to you by Blue Apron. Check out this week’s menu at  


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Posted on 30 June 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 713

Thongs! They are so sexy! But when used as a face mask at the hardware store, what then? A woman has been dating a guy for a few months. He has one of those giant penises you have heard about. So there's that. But he is also saying some troubling, racist and sexist things. So. Should she continue to see the big dick with a big dick? On the Magnum, Dan chats with women's health expert Dr. Tami Rowen about the near ubiquitous practice of pubic hair grooming. Why are so many women bush-whacking? Are there any benefits to leaving your "down there" hair alone? And, a man (with a lovely Irish accent) wants to have kids with his girlfriend, but doesn't want to live with her. Is there a way to maintain a relationship and co-parent from two separate houses?  ThredUP is the world’s largest online thrift store with over 35,000 brands at up to 90% off retail price. For a limited time, get up to 30% off your first order at . This podcast is brought to you by . Click on the microphone and enter "Savage" for postage, a digital scale, and a 4 week trial. The Savage Lovecast is brought to you by Dame Products: a woman-founded sex toy company. Visit to get $10 off your first order.


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Posted on 23 June 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 712

Oh Jesus Mary and Joseph, our opening sex during quarantine story is scorching hot this week, hoo boy. A woman is working from home with her boyfriend. He sets up his computer monitors with one screen always playing Twtich streams with young blonde hotties. Is the caller allowed to be annoyed by this? On the Magnum, sex toy expert and generally charming person Erika Moen is on to make a bunch of recommendations for gear to get you through these extremely challenging times. Also, what is up with sex dolls? A deep discussion ensues. A woman asked her man to dominate her. He responded "You suck at doing dishes!!" That's not what she had in mind. How can she teach him to boss her around sexily? 206-302-2064        voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode of the Savage love cast is brought to you by Everlane: Luxury basic clothing and accessories, made at ethical factories without those retail markups. For free shipping, and to support the Lovecast, go to This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase. Today’s Lovecast is brought to you by MeUndies.com: High quality, super-comfortable, good looking undies. Get 15% off your first order when you go to .


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Posted on 16 June 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 711

At a business meeting, an older, sophisticated gay man gave a presentation with a couple buttons of his jeans undone. Was he sending a message? If so, what? A woman has noticed that men are now wearing wedding rings on BOTH hands. Are they sending a message? If so, what? On the Magnum, it's a deep anal-sex hygiene dive with gay culture columnist Ty Mitchel. A caller wonders why the younger men he sleeps with have trouble keeping...fresh. Dan and Ty are here to help. And, a woman's roommate is going out and having casual hookups. During these 'Rona times, it puts the whole house at risk. How can she confront him about this? 206-302-2064     voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode is brought toy by Tushy- the modern bidet attachment that washes your ass completely. Go to and get 10% off your order with promo code SAVAGE. Stop wiping and start washing with TUSHY. This episode of the Savage Lovecast is sponsored by OMGyes.com: a website dedicated to getting scientific truths out about women's sexual pleasure. Savage Lovecast listeners can get a discount if they go to . This episode is brought to you by Talkspace- online therapy that makes it easy to get extra mental health support. For $100 off your first month, go to T and use the offer code Savage.


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Posted on 9 June 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 710

A remote controlled buttplug? In the bath? This pandemic is getting pretty fun! A woman asks a question that so many of us are also wondering: is it safe to be romantically intimate with someone who has already recovered from covid-19? When? Dan brings on the intrepid Dr. Barak to answer, and as usual hits him with a gnarly second question just to make the good doctor squirm. Are you a parent? Have you had some challenges raising your kids? Is your kid a foot fetishist? If you answered either yes or no to any of these questions, then you're going to want to listen in. And, a man in an open relationship feels empty and sad after he orgasms with anyone but his primary partner. How can he retrain his brain? Tickets to the Savage Lovecast Livestream are at www.savagelovecast.com/events Send your written questions ahead of time to livestream@savagelovecast.com 206-302-2064  voicemail@savagelovecast.com The Savage Lovecast is brought to you by Dame Products: a woman-founded sex toy company. Visit to get $10 off your first order.   ThredUP is the world’s largest online thrift store with over 35,000 brands at up to 90% off retail price. For a limited time, get up to 30% off your first order at . This episode of the Savage love cast is brought to you by Everlane: Luxury basic clothing and accessories, made at ethical factories without those retail markups. For free shipping, and to support the Lovecast, go to


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Posted on 2 June 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 709

A married couple in an open relationship used to enjoy glory holes at play parties. Then along came some covid-19. But did that stop them? Hell no! They grabbed the kids' old sheets and made a home glory hole. Now THAT'S what I'm talking about, America! A man's mother died when he was 13, and his father quickly re-married. He found a letter revealing that his father and step-mother had been having an affair before his mother died. Now what? His dad is sick and old. Should he confront him about it? On the Magnum version of the show, Dan interviews BDSM educator BlakSyn about kink and race play. How can you use words with a history of trauma, in a transformative, consensual way? Is it ever OK to use the word "slave?" What about the N-word? And, a 60 year-old man whispers about how he came 7 times the other night. He just wants you to know this.   Now we know. 206-302-2064  voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase. This episode is brought toy by Tushy- the modern bidet attachment that washes your ass completely. Go to and get 10% off your order with promo code SAVAGE. Stop wiping and start washing with TUSHY. This episode is brought to you by Allform- premium, customizable sofas and chairs shipped right to your door. For 20% off your perfect sofa, go to .


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Posted on 26 May 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 708

A married man is sick of his military husband being overseas all the time. How can they make their  chronically long-distance relationship work?   Ok, here's something you've all wondered: how do you get rid of sex dolls? Are they too toxic for the landfill? Is there a market for "gently used?"   On the Magnum, how are the poly people supposed to do their poly thing, right now? Dan chats with Diana Adams, a lawyer and mediator who specializes in LGBTQ and polyamorous families.   Is there a polite, non-confrontational, and effective way to ask a lover to delete your nudes? You know, before things get bad?   206-302-2064  voicemail@savagelovecast.com   The Savage Lovecast is brought to you by Dame Products: a woman-founded sex toy company. Visit to check out Eva- the hands-free vibrator.   This episode is brought toy by Tushy- the modern bidet attachment that washes your ass completely. Go to and get 10% off your order with promo code SAVAGE. Stop wiping and start washing with TUSHY.   This podcast is brought to you by . Click on the microphone and enter "Savage" for postage, a digital scale, and a 4 week trial.


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Posted on 19 May 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 707

We open the show with a marital tale of delicious rug burn. It's the battle of the podcast Goliaths! Dan welcomes Marc Maron to the show, and the two engage in a civil debate about whether porn can be "addictive." Also, they discuss a very special piece of equipment. Some of this convo is on the Micro version and all of it is on the Magnum. He likes to wear womens' clothing when he spanks it. She thinks this makes him queer. He insists he's not. She says he should find a lady who likes that sort of thing. He says he only wants her. These are the kinds of arguments this couple has. A lesbian plans to propose to her girlfriend of 4 years. She wants to throw a giant "proposal party" with friends and family from far and wide as a surprise. She was planning on doing this soon. You know, during the pandemic? Will Dan talk her out it? God, let's hope so. 206-302-2064  voicemail@savagelovecast.com ThredUP is the world’s largest online thrift store with over 35,000 brands at up to 90% off retail price. For a limited time, get up to 30% off your first order at . Today’s Lovecast is brought to you by MeUndies.com: High quality, super-comfortable, good looking undies. Get 15% off your first order when you go to .   This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.


Audio Download

Posted on 12 May 2020 | 8:00 am


Savage Love Episode 706

Have you ever done it hanging from a cliff in your mountain-climbing harness? This caller has. They named the climb "Quarantine." Meanwhile in Italy, a woman managed to slip a finger in her boyfriend's butt. He didn't stop her, but didn't say anything about it, and they haven't discussed it since. How can she bring it up with him and resume this activity when they are reunited? On the Magnum, Dan chats with JoEllen Notte, author of "The Monster Under the Bed: Sex, Depression, and the Conversations We Aren't Having" about being an introvert during the pandemic, and how it IS possible to be both horny and depressed. A woman is dating a man who cares about his appearance, is capable of crying and makes her breakfast. IS HE GAY? 206-302-2064   voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode of the Savage Lovecast is sponsored by OMGyes.com: a website dedicated to getting scientific truths out about women's sexual pleasure. Savage Lovecast listeners can get a discount if they go to OMGYES.com/Savage. This episode is brought to you by Pill Club: the birth control subscription that is delivered right to your door. Get a special care package with your first delivery. Go to www.thepillclub.com/Savage This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep-the best mattress for your individualized comfort. Right now, get up to $200 off ALL mattress orders at HelixSleep.com/SAVAGE.  


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Posted on 5 May 2020 | 8:00 am